Getting Back to Normal

Hey Guys,

I hope you all had a great weekend! I was soooo excited to be feeling better for the weekend, because I had a lot to do!

Friday night, I went out with a group of people to have drinks and celebrate the end of my treatments - it was interesting because I invited a mixed group of people that didn't know each other (mixing my "worlds" for the sake of a celebration!) I had a few friends from high school and a few friends from the opera, as well as some friends-of-friends that I didn't know well (it's always great to meet new people!). I had planned on going to see the movie Precious with a few people, but when we got to the theater there were two big problems: first of all, it was opening night of Twilight (whoops), so it took FOREVER to find a parking spot.... and then the movie was sold out! I was really surprised, but then I remembered that Precious has been all over the place being backed by Oprah, so I guess I should have expected that the first weekend it might be hard to get a ticket! We ended up going to Hofbrauhaus briefly, but the live music was SO loud, and the only available tables were right by the speakers, so we ended up moving to Bar Louie (where we generally end up). I was really excited to be able to have a drink, and ordered something that I'd been eyeing on the menu for MONTHS but hadn't been able to order. It had all of my favorite things: champagne, strawberry liqueur, strawberry puree, and some other fruity vodka... how could I go wrong?? Unfortunately, I forgot to take into account that the chemo always changes my taste buds for a week or so and it tasted HORRIBLE! I was so disappointed... but I'm definitely going to try ordering it again once I'm back to normal, because I'm positive there's no way it's not delicious!

Saturday night was a ton of fun - I saw Brian in Blood Brothers again at my old high school, and had a great dinner with my mom, one of Brian's friends, and her mom... and then I went to the Opera Ball After-Party. I obviously don't have $250 to spend on a ticket to the actual ball, so it was really great to be able to have the opportunity to get to the after party and enjoy the ambiance and the ballroom with my friends. I got to see a bunch of people that I'd worked with (who I hadn't seen since the summer) and I also got to say hi to one of Brian's doctors (his orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Crawford), who is a HUGE supporter of the arts in Cincinnati. I can't believe that I forgot about my camera, but somehow I did and ended up only taking a few pictures at the very start... I wish I'd taken more, because I got all dressed up, and my friends looked fantastic! Plus, the ballroom was so beautiful! The only downside was that the DJ wasn't so great, but towards the end of the night he started taking requests and playing much better music. The theme was "A Night at the Moulin Rouge," so we were kind of expecting lots of Edith Piaf and fun french music to dance to, but it was a lot of techno and club music, which is cool in that venue, but less cool when you actually want to dance and not just awkwardly jump around...

with Dr. Crawford

with Dina (Lauren's friend), Lauren (we worked together this summer), and Heather (a former opera employee)

Today was another fantastic day - it was my mom's birthday, so I got up early(ish) and made some breakfast - my first successful omelette (I was super proud that it actually turned out), and we had an AMAZING dinner at Carlo & Johnny's, a steakhouse here in Cincinnati. My dad ordered a really good bottle of wine, and I ate so much food! I told my mom I was glad that this is the week that the steroids really hit me, because I can keep eating and eating and not get full as fast as I normally do! Perfect timing for huge birthday dinners AND Thanksgiving!

I hope you guys have a fantastic holiday, and I'll be updating very soon! Most likely with Thanksgiving pictures...

Lots of Love,

Lauren

Surrounded by Britten

Hey Guys,

Yikes, I'm getting really bad at consistently posting!

Anyway, I've been SO happy to get back to class! It's really weird being at a new school, very disorienting. I keep telling myself that I really shouldn't be back to BW anyway (since I'm a fifth year...) and would most likely have been starting Grad school, but it's still weird being someplace new! Especially because I'm taking all upper-level classes with kids who have been together for the last two or three years. I'm the only "new kid"!

My French Civ class is interesting - I can't really figure out WHAT the heck the prof is talking about most of the time, and the class is even in English! I kind of think it's a forum for him to ramble on about his political views, but it's not going to be too much work (only two 1-page papers, a midterm, and a final) and it's all opinion-based, so I'm not too worried about anything but getting bored. Plus there are no windows in the room, so not even anything to distract myself with. The TA is cute, though... and French! He interjects occasionally when he can tell the prof. is getting off topic, so that helps a little bit...

I'm taking a French language course as well - I'm a French minor, so I've taken all the "Advanced" French classes, but I have to go back and take the 200 levels to get the credit for my minor (I skipped them when I was just taking French for fun...). The class I picked to transfer is all about food (I accidentally picked it! They gave me a choice of three courses that would transfer correctly and I picked the third in the series... lucky chance!) and my prof is AMAZING! She's this older French lady (maybe in her 60s?) and used to design lingerie for Victoria's Secret before going back to school, getting her master's in French Lit, and becoming a professor - she also was a professor in the Fashion Design dept. until a couple of years ago. Sooooo cooool! There's a girl in my class that I sit next to who's a Fashion Design major, and she was telling me about a design class for non-majors. She's bringing me some info about it tomorrow in class, and I'm hoping that I might be able to audit or sit in on the class - I've always wanted to take a design class, even though I can't sew or draw... I guess that's why you take class, though...

So far, though, my favorite class is my German Art Song class... It's taught by this tiny, tiny man who knows EVEYRTHING! He reminds me of Dr Strasser (at BW) - just a font of knowledge. We sit in the class (me and 60 voice grad majors - intimidating!) and he talks and we take notes. I'm extra happy that he's not making me sing, either (I wouldn't want to force the other singers to listen to my chemo voice right now!) so I just have to do written work, which isn't a problem for me since I'm not taking a full load of classes OR voice lessons!

I'm also taking an Orchestration class (required for my Music History degree) which I'm still not so sure about. I'm the only vocalist in the class (singers aren't required to take it unless they have a double major, like me) and I know NOTHING about instruments! I warned my professor, though, and she's been really kind and offered to help me out whenever I need it.

I've finally spent a lot of the past few days realllly sitting down and working on my thesis. This is going to (obviously) be a TON of work. I've got a few of my books all read and notated, and I have an EXTREMELY preliminary outline written (just so I have an idea of what to look for when I'm reading my books). My goal is to finish all the books in the next week or so and to have a better outline written by the end of October. Ideally, I'd like to start writing before I go back for the spring. I'm just worried that I'm not going in a good direction, and it's hard to work with my advisor via email! It would be SO much easier to sit down for an hour every week (like I'm supposed to be doing!) and get his advice face-to-face. I'm emailing him to see what I should do about that (maybe find an interim advisor here in Cincinnati?) but in the mean time, I'm slogging along through all of this Britten and Peter Grimes on my own. It's amazing, but overwhelming sometimes!

On a chemo note, I finished my FOURTH round of steroids tonight, which marks the end of my drugs for my fourth cycle! Woohoo! Only two more rounds to go, which means four more chemos, two more weeks of Procarbazine (which doesn't bother me much that I can tell), and four more weeks of steroids (which I HATE). I'm a little but nervous because my counts drop lower and faster with each round, and they've already started dropping according to the bloodwork I had this morning. I'm hoping they'll hold up until this weekend since I'm supposed to give a joint presentation in class on Friday, and I don't want to have to beg off a project already! I mean... I have a good excuse, but still! I had to wear a mask for the first time today - there were tons of sick kids at Outpatient (where I get my blood drawn) and they were all coughing all over the place... Fortunately, the nurses let me go wait for my lab tech in the ultrasound room so I wouldn't have to sit in the waiting room with the sick kids. Score one for being bald! Less exposure to Swine Flu...

Well, I promise I'll be back again soon. Hope you guys are all holding up well & avoiding H1N1!

Lots of Love,

Lauren

@Jacinta - check out your last comment! I put a response in the right place this time!

Bad Moods

Hey Guys,

I've been getting pretty frustrated with myself lately. Throughout the entire first half of my treatment, I managed to stay really upbeat and positive about everything. Lately, however, that doesn't seem to be the case. I've been finding myself in bad moods pretty consistently, and getting frustrated with people who are only trying to help (especially in my family - I'm sorry to all of you guys!).

This is the most time I've spent at my parents' house since I left for college, and I think I'm starting to go a little stir-crazy without much to do, especially since most of my friends are up in Cleveland, and the few that ARE here actually have jobs - so it's hard to see them sometimes. Plus, my blood counts get lower and lower with each treatment, so I'm worrying about days when I can't really go out in public much (remember the meltdown I had when I was supposed to go up to Berea a few weeks ago??)

I'm hoping that when I start classes at UC on Wednesday, some of this will turn around. I'm not used to feeling so negative all the time! I think it's probably due to boredom - I can't seem to really get motivated to do anything that I normally would LOVE to be doing (namely, right now, researching and writing my thesis on a topic I'm super excited about...)

In better news, my mom finally convinced me to organize allll (or... at least most) of my clothes - a majority of my "winter" things are still living in my apartment, which I'll hopefully remember to bring home next time I visit the Cleveland area...

about half of my shoes (too many to fit in one organizer... yikes...)

my tiny closet - organized mostly by color (score one for good ideas)

my new rhinestone sandals... (I mentioned them in my Chicago post)

for some reason, the picture transferred sideways...

Also, my mom and I went today to visit my brother Andrew at Indiana University in Bloomington, IN. It's about a 2.5 hour drive from our house, and it's a really pretty ride through a lot of farms and small towns. We found a new restaurant that none of us had ever been to - it's called Roots, and it is completely vegetarian (or vegan, if you request your meal made that way) and I had some AMAZING polenta with pesto and steamed veggies... I wish I'd thought to take a picture, because it was sooo delicious and colorful.

In chemoland, I've been feeling pretty decent since my Monday treatment - some mild nausea and a few mouth sores, but mostly I've figured out a routine to keep that all under control (unless I do something stupid like forget to take my Kytril - which I did this morning! I'm glad I have my emergency tin of anti-nausea drugs in my purse!) The mouth sores don't suck nearly as much as they did during my first round. I get a little bit of soreness around the bottom and sides of my tongue, but mostly I just get a couple down my throat - which may sound worse, but is actually better since it just feels like having a sore throat.

Finally, I'm really looking forward to helping out with the musical at my little brother's high school (my old school...) They're putting on a production of Blood Brothers, by Willy Russell. Brian will be playing the part of Mr. Lyons - everyone in the Cincinnati area should come out and see him (he's an AMAZING singer!!!). You can contact the Anderson High School Theater Department for tickets (Nov. 19, 20, 21). We'd love to see as many of you there as possible!

Lots of Love,

Lauren

ps posting this has already made me feel better :-)

Finally Made It!

Hey Guys,

As you all know, I was supposed to go up to Berea to visit my apartment and see all of my friends up at school on Tuesday. However, that morning as I was about to walk out the door, Debbie called and gave me some bad news - my ANC (Absolute Neutrophil Count) was wayyyyy too low - 290! It needs to be at 500 for me to be around a few people, and 1,000 before I can safely be in large groups without having to worry about catching every little bug. I was SO disappointed - especially because she wanted me to stay home until THURSDAY to get more bloodwork done and check all of my counts. Fortunately, though, when I called her back later that day, she told me that I could go in early on Wednesday morning to get my workup - and it was at 560! Wooo! So I took off to Berea around 10am on Wednesday.

I was super excited to stop in Columbus and visit Tyler for the afternoon - we had a FANTASTIC lunch and then Tyler took me on a driving tour of the campus area and the victorian-era part of Columbus - the houses were SO BEAUTIFUL! We also walked around the Short North a little bit since it was the middle of the day on a Wednesday and no one was around (safe for my poor white blood cells...)

I made it up to Berea around 4:15 - I FINALLY got to see Gene and Katie and Emma (and Katie and Emma's new apartment right upstairs from mine!). This morning, I was thrilled to get to go sit in on Opera Workshop (one of the classes I'm supposed to be in) and say 'hi' to Scott Skiba (one of my favorite professors) and see everyone in my class (which was... too fantastic for words...) Tonight we're having a big dinner at Cornerstone (an awesome restaurant/brewery in Berea, right next to the Conservatory), and tomorrow I'm headed to Oberlin to have a quick visit with Matt and a dinner party with the girls I went to Italy with last summer (plus Herbert, our Danish friend)

I'm going to head out (I'm in the Music Library and supposed to be working on my Thesis... whoops...) but I wanted to let you all know what was up!

Lots of Love,
Lauren

on the upside...

Hey Guys,

I've been thinking the past few days and I've realized that despite all of the really crappy side effects of the chemo, there are actually a few that I've been really enjoying! (I know that probably sounds really weird)

1) hair loss means ALL hair - not just on your head... this means that I haven't had to shave my legs or under my arms in a few weeks - which is great for the summer

2) hair loss also means shorter showers - a time AND money saver... especially when I'm used to having too much hair, which clogged the shower drains and took forever to wash & dry

3) freckles! I've always wanted freckles, and I've noticed in the past few days that the chemo has been giving me tiny little freckles on my cheeks - apparently they're only temporary, but I'm enjoying them while they last!

4) the BEAUTIFUL skin that is the result of a combo of chemo drugs & bactrum (the antibiotic I have to take twice a day on Mon, Tues, Wed to prevent a chemo-specific strain of pneumonia). My skin is fantastic - clear, smooth, and glowing like I've gotten a facial (but not)

5) people in public assume that because I'm bald, I'm either on chemo or really edgy (since I still have a tiny bit of hair as well as eyebrows and eyelashes), so they're always clearing the way for me to walk through or holding doors... nobody wants to mess with a bald girl

6) I don't have to worry about my hair messing up in the rain... I can just wipe of my head and be done with it! (I still have to worry about my makeup running, though...)

...That's my list for now. I'm not sure I'll come up with much more, but I'm glad there are at least a few good things coming out of this!

Also, I have a funny story to share...

Today I was at IKEA with my family, looking for a futon for Andrew's dorm. So far, I haven't had any issues with strangers commenting at my bald head, and few instances of anyone staring (even little kids). However, today there was a little girl that made me laugh so hard I started crying... I was walking through the store and passed a tiny girl and her bald dad... She was maybe two, three at the oldest. She starts pointing and yelling "That girl has no hair!" I smiled and waved at her, and her dad looked mortified - he picked her up, and she kept yelling - even AFTER he put a pacifier in her mouth and tried to take her around the corner. We ran into them later, and he looked so embarrassed, but I don't particularly care - little kids are basically uncontrollable with what they say! The fact that she was so insistent about it made me laugh so hard - I can imagine that I was probably like that as a

little kid. My mom says I would never stop talking.

Lots of Love,

Lauren

ps here are some pictures of me decked out in a couple of wigs from the opera... Thanks to James Geier for letting me try them on!

Me as Susanna from the Marriage of Figaro

Me as Carmen from... well... Carmen - I look good as a gypsy

No More Hair!

Hey Guys,

For those of you who haven't heard yet, I am now officially bald! (well, except for a few stragglers that insist on hanging on & giving me a nice Alfalfa look when the light hits my head right)

(Tyler & I on our way to Ainadamar/Prom)

The Big Event happened all at once - unfortunately while poor Tyler was visiting. Last week, it had started thinning so I put off washing it until Thursday night's Ainadamar After-Party (I wanted to make sure I had a little hair to go with my awesome dress)... The next morning when I got in the shower, it all came out AT ONE TIME!!! For about 10 minutes I had a great "Little Old Man" look - about 20 pieces of inch-long hair scattered across my scalp. Needless to say, my mom was pretty shocked when I called her up to see it. Fortunately, she has the clippers and got right to buzzing the rest of it down to the scalp.

I was afraid that I'd be really traumatized when it happened, and I have to admit, there were a few tears - but all in all, I'm not hating the look. The worst part about being bald is that my head is ALWAYS cold! I haven't been wearing my wig because it's so hot outside, but it's freezing in my office! I've been wearing scarves occasionally, but they're kind of a pain sometimes (especially when I'm running around the building constantly). So far, I've gotten really good reactions about the new 'do... People (especially guys) seem to be fascinated with the fact that I don't have hair AND I'm not covering it up - the guys at the Opera (gay and straight) love coming up and touching my head (which I find hilarious and extremely unexpected)... It's also cool to be able to play with makeup and jewelry in a way that I wasn't able to when I had tons of hair... So far, the only person who seems to take any issue with my baldness is one of the Supernumerary Kids in Carmen - she keeps giving me weird looks, and I'm pretty sure she doesn't like my haircut...

On a different note, I started my second round of chemo on Monday (only 5.5 more to go!) and it went pretty much as smoothly as the first one. Well, after it FINALLY got started... When I got in on Monday morning, there was a HUGE backup in the Day Hospital due to a bunch of unexpected emergency kids, and I didn't end up getting started for about 2 hours after my appointment was supposed to start.

(Me & Tom)

After the chemo finally got started, though, everything was great. I was really happy to have a visit from Tom Jaworek and his mom (who is a good friend of my mom) - he's a couple years older than I am and is being treated at Children's right now also, so it was good to have him come up and say hi - we've never been in at the same time before... Also Molly and Dan stopped by with some games (that ended up not getting played), and it was fantastic to have Molly visit! She actually spent the entire visit in my hospital bed with me, which was awesome. Melissa came later on in the day, which was great - especially for my mom, who needed a break from the hospital room and was able to take some time to run down to the cafeteria and grab some food.

(Me & Molly!)

On the topic of food, Children's Hospital is great because they have "room service" that the patients (generally kids) can call and order from - it's a HUGE menu, with all kinds of kid-friendly foods that take me back to my childhood... Unfortunately, since it is a CHILDREN'S hospital, when you order off the "room service," everything comes in kid's portions... which gets EXTREMELY frustrating when you're 22 and have an appetite much bigger than the average patient. First of all, when I call, they always ask me for my child's information... and then expect me to order food for a kid... I generally forget that there will be a child's portion, and end up getting something like 3 fishsticks or 4 raviolis... not enough for a meal! The good thing, though, is that the cafeteria downstairs is FANTASTIC (although a little expensive), but we can also bring our own snacks.

...And even some more about food...

Originally, when I had my first treatment, I was given a short list of foods to avoid during the week that I was on oral chemo. The list consisted of bananas, citrus fruit, cheese, dark beer, and wine... all of which I was totally okay to stay away from - I hate bananas, I had mouth sores so citrus hurt, and I generally don't drink tons of alcohol, so that was cool to avoid. Unfortunately, because of the mouth sores, I lost my appetite and lost almost 10lbs in one week (don't worry, I've since gained it back)... Because of the weight loss, when I came back in for my treatment on Monday, they had a dietician come in to give me some options for healthy, high calorie foods (I was happy about this because I'd been eating a lot of high-calorie junk food, which was also making me sick since I was used to a healthy diet...) When she came, she also brought with her a list of foods that caused interactions with the oral drug I'm on. The list she had was MUCH longer than the list I had originally received, and includes things that are much harder to avoid. No foods that have been fermented or aged in any way (no alcohol, cheese, yogurt, soy sauce, ripe fruit, milk close to its expiration date, sausage, pepperoni, salami) and nothing that's been processed (lunch meat, meat treated with tenderizers, gravy, meat stock/broth, etc.) as well as a variety of things such as raspberries, avocados, chocolate, and caffeine (all of which I'm very disappointed about). Plus, I had to avoid all of those foods two weeks after I finished the drug - basically 3 out of 4 weeks of each cycle. We were immediately worried because I've been eating LOTS of those things and we were afraid that they had messed with my chemo.

Fortunately (sort of), we found out that while they won't mess with the chemo, they will cause a variety of other side effects that I'd been experiencing, but had no idea why - high blood pressure and plus, tingling in my extremities - all things that are kind of worrisome. So now I'm on a pretty careful diet of basically fresh veggies and chicken, with some extra stuff thrown in every once in awhile. I'm happy that I can still eat ice cream, because I'm worried that I'm going to lose more weight while I'm basically on this low-calorie diet for the next six months or so. The dietician gave me a bunch of high-calorie snacks and shakes I can make, which all sound pretty delicious (lots involving peanut butter, milk, and ice cream - I can't complain about that!)

Finally, I want to thank the Ross family for the BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers I came home to on Monday evening - they still look amazing, and my room smells fantastic... the smell and the flowers are wonderful to wake up to every morning! Thank you so much!

Also, I want to send good vibes out to Tom and the rest of the Jaworek family - Tom had his big surgery Wednesday, and Jacqueline called to say he was doing well, but I'm thinking of all of you and looking forward to seeing you guys soon!

Lots of Love,

Lauren

ps - for all of you up in the Cleveland/Berea area, I'll be up at T in the P for a week or so starting August 2 or 3... give me a call/send me a message so we can get together!

At the Opera...

Hey Guys,

Today I decided I'm going to do an entry about my summer job! I keep getting lots of questions from all you guys who are out of Cincinnati wanting to know how it's going, what I do, etc...

My official "title" is the Rehearsal Department Intern, which is an internship in the Production Department.

As the Rehearsal Department Intern, mostly I deal with scheduling - I work with Stephanie (who is the Production Coordinator) to obtain, write, publish, and distribute the schedules for any events, meetings, rehearsals, etc. that occur throughout the season. Usually what happens is that the Stage Manager of a particular production will bring the calls for the next day to Stephanie and she will put them into the schedule format. After this (as long as there are no last minute changes!) I take the draft of the schedule to Glenn (the Director of Production) and Marcus (the Director of Artistic Operations) to have it approved. Glenn looks for things like crew hours, space issues, and "production" based problems, and Marcus checks the artists' hours to make sure that no one is rehearsing more than their contract allows.

After Glenn and Marcus approve the schedule, I get to make enough copies of the schedule for everyone in the company - from the business side to the artistic side to the production side to the artists themselves, almost everyone who works for the opera gets a copy of the schedule in some form, and I get to pass out alllllllll of the hard copies.

For the rest of the day, I sit at a vanity (seriously, it's a counter in a dressing room with a mirror surrounded by lights...) in an "office" that I share with Stephanie (my boss)... we answer phones, answer questions about the schedule (and all sorts of random things) from artists, etc. ...

During performances, mostly I sit in my office, but people are always coming to visit - some of our chorus friends, Jared (the Associate Artistic Administrator) and his assistant, The Other Lauren... All kinds of fun people - we always have people coming and going, which makes things pretty interesting once we've gotten the schedule out for the day...

I've only got a few weeks left here, but so far it's been one of the best experiences I've ever had. A couple of summers ago, I sang with the opera chorus, and I had no idea how much work went into the rehearsals, etc.... Now I hope that when I was in the chorus that I was kind and courteous to all of the staff members! yikes!

On another note, I'm totally going to plug AINADAMAR (click on the link for the Cincinnati Opera's website & more info) for all you people who are here in Cincinnati - it's a FANTASTIC modern opera about the life of Spanish playwright Federico Garcia Lorca, Margaret Xirgu, and a few other key players... It's in Spanish and only 90 minutes long, plus the music is BEAUTIFUL - there's a guitar and a flamenco singer. It's completely different than any other opera I've ever seen before. If you've never seen opera, or if you've seen opera but not enjoyed the length/plot/music, AINADAMAR is the perfect opera to come see... 7/9 and 7/11 at 7:30 with a HUGE dance party in the ballroom after the 7/9 performance... send me a message or give me a call if you want tickets at half price!

Also my hair is coming out for real now... every morning for the past couple of days, I've been waking up with a liberal sprinkling of hair all over my pillow - I'm afraid to wash it because I'm worried it's all going to come out at once! My wig is getting it's last styling this Thursday, so I'm hoping a reasonable amount of my hair will stay in until then so I'm not walking around with what my mom and brother call "leopard hair"

Finally, I wanted to thank everyone who has sent me cards/gifts/etc in the mail... I have a whole shelf in my room now with beautiful (and some hilarious) cards that people have sent me... Thank you guys all so much for your support! I really appreciate it A LOT!

Lots of Love,

Lauren

First Treatment (with photos!)

Hey Guys!

Sorry it took so long to get all of this posted - I just got a new laptop & I've been playing with it & trying to figure out how to get everything to work (including loading new pictures)

ANYWAY...

Back to Monday - I had my first chemo treatment, and it went just about as smoothly (maybe even more so) than I had anticipated! Unfortunately, I had to get there at 7:30am, which kind of sucked, but later on in the day I got to nap, so that made u

p for the missed morning sleep.

I was surprised at how quickly I got taken back to my room - everything was all setup and waiting for me, with a little bucket that I referred to as my "Welcome Basket" - with all of my IV paraphernalia and bags of fluids that they were planning on giving me that day.

I met with my doctor and the fellow who would be following my doctor & helping her keep track of everything. In a coincidence, the fellow's name is Sarah and we happen to have the same birthday! So this coming Monday when I go in for my treatment, I'm planning on bringing a couple of cupcakes for a little morning celebration (and hope that I can get out early enough to have a real celebration!)

The most nerve-wracking part of the entire day was having my port accessed. Earlier in the morning, my mom had put some numbing cream (Emla) on it so that the skin over my port would be completely numb before I was accessed, but since I'd only had it put in a few days before, it was a little swollen and raw and I was really afraid it was still going to hurt.

However, it was so quick I probably wouldn't have even noticed it if I hadn't had to lay in a kind of awkward position. The nurse was fantastic - she was only a couple years older than I am, and she was really cool about getting everything done quickly. Basically, when she put the IV in my port, it just felt like she was pushing down on the cap of a jar that had already been opened (which was a weird but kind of cool sensation under my skin):

After I had my port accessed, it was a little sore and would be sore on and off for the rest of the day, but my nurse told me that it had to do with the fact that it was new and tender - she's right... it's been over a week now since I had it put in and now I basically forget that it's there...

For the rest of the day, I mostly just hung out with my mom and my brother. My brother had been at a sleepover the night before, and was a HUGE source of emotional support from his place on the recliner next to my bed:

He basically slept the entire day! I was extremely jealous...

One thing that I wasn't expecting was how easy the treatment was. When they came and changed my bag from saline fluids to the chemo, I was expecting to be able to tell the difference... Maybe start having some side effects right away or getting more tired, but for the most part I couldn't tell the difference. Until I started sweating. That was the only side effect that I experienced for the majority of the day - I felt like I was going through menopause and having hot flashes! I was sweating SO MUCH and was really happy that I wore layers. The sweating wasn't bothering me too much though until I had to get a shot in my bottom (which didn't hurt at the time but felt SO bruised for several days afterwards). It was totally worth it though because the shot makes it so I won't have my period for three months... I'm thinking people should ALWAYS have this shot!

Another interesting thing about being at Children's is how accommodating everyone is - the nurses and doctors are so kind and were really great about explaining everything to me, not just assuming that if I wanted to know something that I'd ask a question. A lot of the time, I didn't even know that I wanted to ask a question until they had already answered it! It was awesome, too, that I had a room service menu that I could order off of and they'd bring me almost anything I wanted within 45 minutes. The menu was HUGE and had everything from cereal and gummy bears to spaghetti dinners and pretty much anything you can think of - especially fun kids food like teddy grahams and chicken nuggets... I took full advantage of that and ordered two lunches.

I also got to leave a lot earlier than I had been anticipating. I had assumed I'd be there til about 8pm, but was home by about 5:30 - it was great, because I was able to have dinner at home and relax a little. The doctor and nurses had also been preparing me to get pretty sick that morning and the next day, but I felt almost perfectly fine. I had a little bit of nausea, but they gave me some great medication called Zofran that took that away almost immediately.

I was feeling so great for the first couple of days after I had my first treatment, but I probably should have looked a little closer at what I was eating. I'm taking a couple of oral drugs, and I knew the oral chemo had several food interactions, so I was being very careful to stay away from cheese, bananas, coffee, soft drinks, wine, and beer (the coffee, wine, and beer are especially hard when I'm working with so many fun people who I love going out with) - but I hadn't realized that I had to stay away from spicy as well. I made the terrible mistake of having some incredible pad thai that my wonderful boss Stephanie brought for dinner on Wednesday, and unfortunately, I'm still paying for it. I was supposed to start a mouth-care regime when I had my first treatment, but I'm pretty sure they forgot to give it to me until I called my nurse on Thursday because I've started to develop mouth sores. They're not sores yet, but they're raw spots all around my tongue and at the back of my throat. They weren't expecting me to get them so soon, but since I LOVE spicy food and didn't know to stay away from it, they've started earlier. I'm on something now, but am very disappointed to be having to stick to a bland diet until it all heals up (my mom assures me that this will happen soon, and if I stick with my mouthwash, they hopefully won't be a problem again). You'd be surprised at how fast a mostly ice cream and milkshake diet starts to suck.

Another side effect I've started seeing is the weight loss - although I can't tell if it's from the chemo directly or from not wanting to eat because of the sores. I'm afraid that they're going to put me on some kind of special diet because I've lost a few pounds since Monday, but I guess things could be much worse.

I've also been keeping up at work really well - I love my job and I've been making some new friends with the chorus people that I didn't know before and with some of the other interns. I want to give a HUGE thank-you to Deb Van Engen and all of the lovely chorus members who gave me a mani-pedi from Mitchell's yesterday, along with a very sweet card. You guys are so fantastic, and thank you so much for thinking of me!

That's basically all for now - I go back in on Monday, and will definitely be updating sooner! It'll be my birthday, so hopefully things will be a little more festive! Also since I've been less tired, I'm planning on attending more opera events, so look out for some fun tidbits about all of the crazy people I encounter coming in and out of this building...

As a sign-out story, I'll give you a quick story about a character I met last night.

As the rehearsal department intern with the opera, I do a lot of sitting in a converted dressing room and answering phones and questions. Last night, after the piano tech was over and the production people were having the post-rehearsal meeting, I was approached by one of the older first-time supernumeraries. This is not an area which I have any answers for. He begins by arguing with me about the call time for the Dress Rehearsal tonight. When I finally convince him that he does indeed need to show up at 5:30 instead of 6:30, he proceeds to ask me if he will be allowed to bring his clothes and his wallet into my office tomorrow for me to hold onto for him. I explain that that is something he will have to discuss with the Supernumerary Captain, and that I am not responsible for his belongings. Finally, he leaves me with this lovely mental image: he asks if he will be allowed to have his makeup applied in his underwear, and then "hang out" in his underwear until he is required onstage since his costume is extremely hot.

I had no words.

Talk to you soon,

Lots of love,

Lauren

Catch-Up Time

Hey Guys,

I'm pretty sure if you're reading this, you basically know what's been going on. BUT just in case, I'll do a little catch up.

Two(ish) weeks ago I went in to have a lump on my neck biopsied... a few days later I got the news that I had Hodgkin's Lymphoma (very treatable but still scary...)

Last week, I met with my oncologist for the first time (Dr. Denise Adams @ Children's here in Cincinnati) and found out that I am at stage IIA, which means low-risk with relatively small tumors/enlarged lymph nodes and no secondary symptoms. Originally the plan was to do nine weeks of several low-dose chemotherapy drugs, but today I got the news that Dr. Adams has changed her mind and I'm going to be having about four months of therapy with a couple more drugs than originally anticipated. Unfortunately, this means that I'm going to be missing a significant portion of the fall semester (sorry, BW people!) - but hopefully I'll be able to do some correspondance work and keep up on classes even if I'm not there...

As unhappy as this makes me, it's a little more comforting to know that I'm going to have more treatments because I was slightly nervous at having so little chemo... The new course of treatment Dr. Adams is perscribing is better for cutting down the risk of relapse in people who have enlarged lymph nodes in the chest (like I do)

On a higher note, today I got to order a wig! My mom's friend Sue set me up with a couple of wonderful ladies at Allusion's in Kenwood - a hair loss treatment facility that works especially with women who have lost their hair due to chemotherapy. In two weeks, I get to pick it up (pictures will be posted) - it'll be made out of human hair, dyed and permed to look like my own hair... Will you guys even be able to tell the difference??

I'm also going to get a little help from the hair and makeup dept here at the Opera - James Geier, the wigmaster, has offered to help me with false eyelashes and drawing on eyebrows so I can look as good as possible through the entire process...

SO all in all, I'm hoping to get a lot of valuable lessons out of this experience (good, bad, and funny) and I plan on posting most (if not all) of them on here to share with you. I'll keep trying to be pretty vigilant about updating (especially when I'm bored) and providing pictures to accompany posts (as soon as I figure out how to do that...)

I'm going to post the link to this blog on Facebook so I can keep as many people updated as possible... Also, don't be afraid to pass the link along to people who I may not be connected to on Facebook!

Lots of Love,
Lauren